No, It's Your Fault.

Blame-shifting and projecting one’s own guilt onto others are common ways of soothing one’s conscience and making it possible to live with one’s own mistakes.

Narcissists, toxic people and perpetrators often use these tactics to avoid facing their own weaknesses and feelings of inferiority.

When this happens in childhood, it leaves a lasting mark. Children learn lessons that stay with them for a lifetime. They learn to survive.

They learn what they must do to be loved: adapt and stay silent, ask for little and give themselves up, be kind and patient – and always put their own needs last so that the other person is not disappointed, so that they are loved.

We deserve to gain a different perspective on things and on ourselves.

A perspective shaped by self-love and self-care – without feelings of guilt or a guilty conscience.

It takes courage and strength, because the path towards that perspective, away from repression, is hard. Very hard.

But it is worth it. And it is time to learn to say “No”.

!! “No, it’s not my fault. It’s YOUR fault!”

🖤🖤🖤

As a survivor of a traumatic childhood, I am not speaking as a psychological counsellor. I am telling my story from lived experience and sharing what I have come to understand.

♥